She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
Randomize
