everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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