It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
Randomize
