we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize
