So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
Randomize
