i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
