Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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