I like my sex mixed with concussions.
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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