Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize