We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Randomize