Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
We left an ass print on the piano.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
