When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
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