I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
Randomize
