On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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