its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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