I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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