I saw his package. It spoke to me.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
Randomize