i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
Randomize
