five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Randomize
