I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Top reasons to NOT leave jessica to her own devices : 1. Drinking becomes a competitive sport ( in which she is the only one competing) 2.big girl words= no worky 3. Whiskey refuses to be a good friend (as much as she insists ). 4. Waking up at six a.m. still in her swim suit is super awkward. 5. It isn't a fun game to figure out which person she gave her number to and 6. Yesterdays eyeliner doesn't look good today.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Randomize
