And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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