He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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