I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize