I'm really into asian looking animals
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
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