Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
