I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
