How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
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