Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
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