Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Randomize
