Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
We don't watch enough power rangers
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
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