im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
Enjoy the penises
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
Randomize
