Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
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