i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
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