idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
Randomize
