i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
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