what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
Randomize
