the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize