Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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