so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
