So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
