I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
