Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Everclear isn't food dammit
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
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