She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
Randomize
