I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize
