Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
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