this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
Randomize
