He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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