Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Randomize
