its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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