He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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