So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
Randomize
