is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize
